ISSUES

Sometimes I feel worn out from caring about the "issues" in my friends lives. I wish I could have just one friend who had no "issues", who had a perfect life, perfect children, perfect health, perfect husband and perfect money. But then of course I would hate her! So maybe I do have such a friend I just don't know it because I hate her so much for having no "issues".

Seriously though can you imagine having a friend who didn't have some sort of hardship in their life? Would that mean God wasn't working on them? Wasn't refining or purifying them? How awful to have a friend that God didn't want to make more like Himself. A friend that God wasn't using difficult situations in her life to make her more compassionate, more forgiving, more thoughtful, more just or more loving. A friend left to follow every sinful inclination of her natural born heart.

So in a away I'm glad to be tired. It means my friends around me are fighting the good fight! And being exhausted must mean I am battling shoulder to shoulder with them! Thank God we can't battle beyond that which we are able and the shoulder next to mine and my friends can't fail.

Amen Sister!

"I would be most content if my children grew up to be the kind of people who think decorating consists mostly of building enough bookcases." - Ann Quindlen, "Enough Bookshelves," in The New York Times (Aug. 7, 1991)

Sweetness 

"Here Mom, it's for you" 

Julia with her "Pooh" and "'Lo" (Winnie the Pooh and Hello) 

I felt like supermom!

Last night I had one of those rare moments when I KNEW why I'm not a career woman and more of a housewife/mom than a professional. I'm not saying that if I was a full time working professional that this conversation wouldn't have happened but for me to have the time to "hang out" with my kids builds the relationships that makes my kids comfortable with having these kinds of conversations. Gabe had had a hard day at school. He was tired and his blood sugar probably wasn't at the right level and he was really feeling down. Gabe freaks out at night if I don't pray with him before he goes to sleep and last night he needed to "talk" before we prayed. We talked about how we as Christians can react when people are mean to us. He asked me if I had ever had friends be mean to me. I told him that as a child I had grown up in a very strict religious organization that meant my only friends to the age of 14 were contained in this exclusive religious group. At 14 my family left the organization and all my friends except one that had already left refused to speak to or have any contact with me. I told him that I had learned a couple of things. One that Jesus is always with you and always your friend. I told him that Jesus says that he loves us and that he says we are worthwhile people therefore what others say although hurtful isn't the truth. I told him that he needed to remember that his friends weren't perfect and he needed to forgive them. I said you know, "God promises that once you've asked Him into your heart he will work on you for your entire life to make you more like Him." I said, "God is not going to let your friends continue to do mean things like call you names for their entire lives. He will be faithful to show them that their actions are wrong and they will someday be sorry they treated you that way. But you also need to remember that God forgave you your sins and hurtful actions before you ever asked him to so you should forgive your friends now even if they don't tell you they are sorry." There is nothing like being able to be there and speak truth and character building lessons into your child at the exact moment when they are open and vunerable to such lessons. I pray that he will remember this things later when the hurts from friends can go much deeper than name calling and athletic ablility put downs. I want my children to be sensative to others but have a strenght of self confidence that comes from their value in God not a false puffed up self importance or a bad self image that comes from the lies of this world. I realize that most of the times that I feel like I'm doing something right isn't when "I" have got it right it is the rare times I'm really allowing God to speak through me and not letting "ME" get in the way.

I'm feelin hip, I'm feelin' cool

I've got my new coffee mug! BRUGO to be exact! "The perfect degree of taste" I ordered these three weeks before Christmas, due to them being featured on Good Morning America I didn't get it till today! Now I'm hip, now I'm cool! I don't need a New Year's Resolution, I've got BRUGO! HA
http://www.brugomug.com/

Bloggers are annoying!

I almost deleted my blog yesterday...I still might do it! When I log on to www.blogger.com and before I put in my username and password there is a randomly scrolling list of the most recently updated blogs. You can click on any of them and see what other people are posting...OH MY GOSH DO PEOPLE GET ANNOYING! Blogs seem to be the soap boxes of people that you would run like crazy from if you saw them anywhere within 100 yards! I guess it's easy to be bigoted and closed minded with an audience that you assume agrees with you. I guess only my friends are reading my blog, but who knows? All that to say, I LOVE my friends blogs, I check them a couple of times a day, makes me wish they'd post more (Carrie, Kellie, Kyrstin, Julie, anyone else out there? Marie under an assumed name? HA) they aren't remotely annoying. So if anyone out there thinks I'm starting to get too one sided in my posting let me know! (maybe for the first notice discreetly in an email instead of posted as a comment on my blog, if I don't listen then have at it) By the way that invitation was for friends only. If you are randomly reading this blog and don't like it....GO SOME WHERE ELSE!

PsychoBaby here! Julia tried to kill herself three times today by: 1. opening the car door as we went down the highway, 2.falling down the stairs (she's been doing stairs forever this is a freak thing), and 3. falling over a pillow as she tried to bring me a jar of peanut butter and a steak knife pointed up! AHHHH Here goes my hope of having one calm child! 

Just because

I'm posting today out of a sense of obligation...or maybe its just avoiding other stuff I need to be doing. I'm tired today, didn't sleep good last night, had lots of weird dreams and kept waking up worried I was oversleeping cause Gabe and Emma went back to school today. They were so excited and bouncing off the walls, bad mix with an over tired grouchy mom! I threatened 'em within an inch of their lives (or so they thought, no friends over and no PS2) if they came home with reports that they were not well behaved today! Julia just finally went down for a nap and I'm trying to decide between competing priorities 1. TAKE A NAP, 2. DO some not urgent but necessary work for my job, 3.Wash my hair. I'm leaning very hard towards #1!-Maybe just 30 minutes. Then I can still do 2 and 3.

Gee what a boring post!

Pssst...its a secret....

I worked out today....FOR AN HOUR! I'm sure this is the surefire way to kill any hope of a good New Years resolution! 1. Tell someone what your resolution is...garrenteed way to make sure you don't keep it up for more than a week; 2. Keep it on January 1st!...probably means I won't work out again for another 365 days! I pretty much make it a habit NOT to make any New Years Resolutions cause I'm not too good at sticking with anything...except Ray, and I still consider that a major miracle...the longest I'd dated anyone before Ray was 3 months...now I've been married 12 years!!!!...ooops I hope I didn't just jinx myself! Anyway I'm not sure what my resolution is but working out on January 1st sure looks suspicious! Anyone out there care to share their Resolutions or Nonresolutions? I promise not to hold it against you if you never keep it!

Gabe exploring caves in Missouri over Thanksgiving 

My cutie pie...growin up so fast! 

Me and my cyclin' dude. 

Me and my girls, Emma and Julia 12/26/2005 

I can tell you the meaning of Christmas Charlie Brown

I hate to admit it but I actually got weepy watching the Peanuts Christmas cartoon today...I could blame it on the fact that I've gone three nights in a row without sleep (Thursday night me with the stomach virus, Friday night Ray with the stomach virus, and Saturday night Emma, Today is Sunday...), but really I love Linus and his amazing ability to take a group of flaky people with whacked priorities and stand up in front of them and say out loud what really is important....a babe wrapped in swaddeling clothes and lying in a manger and angles saying "I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all people; for today in the city of David there has been born for you a Savior, who is Christ the Lord." I guess it is a sign of my times that I can't even read those verses in Luke 2 with out hearing a lisp (Linus' that is). Same as I can't read half of the Bible without breaking into Veggie Tales songs! Witshing You and Yourths a Very Merry Christhmis!

A change in Values

For someone who really values their perceived originality and independence I'm not doing too well this year. I started a blog...How unoriginal...and after laboring over the title (okay so I thought about it for 15 minutes) I came up with "From My Texas Window" totally forgetting that my friend Carrie (who is very cutting edge) had a similar name for her blog. Then I decided since we weren't going to Laredo for Christmas this year I would make tamales at home...Kellie Avery however had already had the thought and has successfully completed the task. Gee whiz, I'm going to have to find something else to stand for other than individuality...hummmm lets see how about constancy.

If I could buy every friend a book for Christmas....

It would be Soul Survivor...How Thirteen Unlikely Mentors Helped My Faith Survive the Church by Philip Yancey.

This for me is one of those books that has quotes I want to paint on my walls...Oh for the days when I'm not living in a future rent house and can do very personal non generic decorating things! I dream of having this book written in a children's version so that I can read it to my son and give him modern day role models. One of the overwhelming thoughts I get from this book is that life is complicated and rather than feel defeated by this complexness, I need to focus on a few. I'm not very good at "sticking with" things, but I feel the responsibility to "stick with" a few that I know I should influence for their and the worlds good.

Sick Babies

There is nothing sadder than a sick baby. My baby isn't THAT sick, but it doesn't take much to break your heart. The hoarse cough, the rasping breathing, hot little hands and cheeks and the heavy eyelids--just about killin me! I have to say when it happens to your third child though it is much easier to be sad in a mommy sort of way rather than that all out terrified panic when your first born gets croup for the first time! Man I know I aged a decade that night!

I love Ice/Snow Days

Today school was once again cancelled for ICE on the roads. It is amazing how much I can get done when I don't have to stop and run to the school so many times a day! Also when I am just plain homebound....All that to say...I think I'm going to try and go out after about 1:00...CABIN FEVER IS DRIVING ME NUTS!